New Assignments

by hilzoy

Note to Barack Obama: there are ways to deal with all those unqualified appointees that Bush has smuggled into the civil service:

"A MAVERICK Thai general who has threatened to bomb anti-government protesters and drop snakes on them from helicopters has been reassigned as an aerobics teacher, the Bangkok Post said on Friday.

Major-general Khattiya Sawasdipol, a Rambo-esque anti-communist fighter more commonly known as Seh Daeng, reacted with disappointment to his new role as a military instructor promoting public fitness at marketplaces.

'It is ridiculous to send me, a warrior, to dance at markets,' he said, before launching an attack on his boss, army chief Anupong Paochinda.

'The army chief wants me to be a presenter leading aerobics dancers. I have prepared one dance. It's called the 'throwing-a-hand-grenade' dance', he said." (h/t)

I can see it now: John Yoo's minions assigned to teach Pilates classes in our nation's federal penitentiaries. Preferably in deeply embarrassing Spandex costumes. "I have prepared one dance", they will say. "It's called the 'indefinite detention without charges' dance." At which point the prisoners will laugh in their faces.

I think the Thai government might be onto something.

Comments

[Anthony Damiani]

Apparently, they were tired of all those motherf'n snakes on those motherf'n helicopters.

[MeDrewNotYou]

As funny as seeing the 'indefinite detention without charges' dance would be, I think Anthony is on to someting. Obama needs to hire Samuel L. Jackson as the Secretary of Keeping Motherf'ers In Line.

Imagine Dick Cheney being served a subpoena. Imagine him turning it down. Imagine the new Secretary serving it to him.

[Victor Tremblay]

2008 is definitely not mavericks' best year.

[John Thullen]

Brilliant, Hilzoy!

Actually, though, President Obama ought to issue an executive order terminating all suspect moles.

They, of course, having whined all these millenia about Federal employees NOT being fired at will, will use every lever at their disposal (Equal Opportunity for Republican subversives) to hang on their jobs and continue to drown the their baby, the United States Government.

[John Wedoff]

It's hypocritical, John, but I suppose we can't really blame them just for playing with the rules as aggressively as they can.

We're thinking about using a Clinton-era Republican-authored bill to roll back Bush's last minute changes, right?

[russell]

It's hypocritical, John, but I suppose we can't really blame them just for playing with the rules as aggressively as they can.

Sure. And turnabout is fair play.

I say we open a new branch of the state department -- the Office of Fictional State Relations. Everyone hired by, frex, Monica Goodling gets an ambassadorship to a place that doesn't exist.

They can clear their desks, pack their bags, and go wait in the lobby at Washington International for the next flight to their appointed fictional nation.

Monica Goodling herself, of course, gets to be Ambassador to Fredonia!

Thanks -

[RepubAnon]

It's the Japanese "salaryman" solution: don't fire them, just give them a desk and no assigned tasks.

There's even a reasonable-sounding place we could create to send them: the "Null Hypothesis" department. If they're so convinces global warming and other ideas are myths - let them come up with real evidence disproving it. Of course, if they lie or distort the underlying facts, we'd discipline or fire them.

[cleek]

just give them a desk and no assigned tasks.

but don't take away their red staplers. that kind of thing can push a man too far.

[superdestroyer]

I guess much like Democrats do not want to have to follow the National Environmental protection Act when it is inconvient, not Democrats want to ignore the same Civil Service Laws that they have promoted for decades.

I hope that the eight years of the Obama Administration are not filled with leftist progressives ignoring the rules that they do not like.

[Nell]

Don't worry, superd. I haven't found anyone in the new administration I'd even call a progressive, much less a leftist.

And we're amusing ourselves with fantasy scenarios here in blogworld exactly because the Obama administration is going to do very little to remove the unqualified, ideological hires who've been inserted into the civil service. (Which is because they're going to follow the civil service rules, which make it incredibly difficult to remove the moles and deadwood.)

Hell, Obama's passed up a chance to remove a far more visible mole at the head of the Homeland Security and Government Operations committee, one not protected by any formal procedures. And his people are busily signaling any reporter who'll listen that there will be no prosecutions for torture or any other crimes committed by the outgoing regime.

Not that you're sincerely worried; your comment is just another example of the tired right-wing tic of projection.

[russell]

I guess much like Democrats do not want to have to...

I propose a new posting rule.

Indulge in tu quoque, and you have to pay the kitty $5.00.

The editors can spend it on hosting fees. If there's any left over, they can treat themselves to a lovely dinner. They deserve it.

Thanks -

[theo]

Monica Goodling herself, of course, gets to be Ambassador to Fredonia!

You kidding? She couldn't even get into SUNY for undergrad, much less law school.

[freelunch]

Monica Goodling herself, of course, gets to be Ambassador to Fredonia!

You kidding? She couldn't even get into SUNY for undergrad, much less law school.

So, Gloria Teasdale never understood what was going on when Rufus T. Firefly waggled his eyebrows and made rude comments to her, either.

[DrDick]

True. After all, somebody has to clean the toilets in the executive office buildings. Seems about right for this crew.

[Ugh]

John Yoo's minions assigned to teach Pilates classes in our nation's federal penitentiaries. Preferably in deeply embarrassing Spandex costumes.

now you have reminded me that I once saw Yoo working out in the UC Berkeley gym.

[Peter K.]

'It is ridiculous to send me, a warrior, to dance at markets,' he said, before launching an attack on his boss, army chief Anupong Paochinda.

'The army chief wants me to be a presenter leading aerobics dancers. I have prepared one dance. It's called the 'throwing-a-hand-grenade' dance', he said."

Is he tempting fate or what?

[Warren Terra]

Last time I looked (at least a semester ago; I'm neither a law student nor a Berkeley student, so I'm disinclined to go googling around again to find and attempt to understand their course catalog), the only way to take the Constitutional Law class at Berkeley Law was to accept the tutelage of Professor Yoo. Such duties are hardly the equivalent of being required to perform risible antics in spandex in public as an object lesson. I'm (still) shocked the students and faculty of Berkeley are so supine in the face of Yoo's professorship. I respect the institution of tenure, but even more strongly I oppose the institution of torture; even if his position could not be terminated, I'd think that at the least catcalls and pickets could follow Yoo everywhere he went.

[liberal japonicus]

WT,
actually, Brad DeLong had a bunch of stuff about the faculty protests concerning Yoo, but with the redesign of his site, they seem to have moved off of the front page. I am assuming that all avenues for censuring Yoo have been exhausted. I also assume that students who disrupt classes or lectures would be subject to penalties.

[MattinPA]

For a moment I thought the proposed way of dealing with the unqualified appointees was, in fact, to drop snakes on them from helicopters. If we could muster an all-volunteer force of snakes I think it would deserve to be considered.

[doretta]

Then we could read articles quoting anonymous sources reporting that Monica complains that she should have gotten Upper Slobovia or at the very least, Elbonia.

That's what I call good times.

[Jeff]

And his people are busily signaling any reporter who'll listen that there will be no prosecutions for torture or any other crimes committed by the outgoing regime.

There's good reason to believe that he would signal this regardless of his intentions. If Obama makes clear he will prosecute, Bush will pardon like there's no tomorrow (which there shouldn't be). This is the only way to get Bush to run oput the clock so there CAN be someone to prosecute.

[Hartmut]

The "imaginary country" positions for undesired unfirables was pioneered by the RCC making out-of-line bishops formal heads of dioceses that ceased existing many centuries ago (e.g. bishop J.Gaillot who responded by founding a new Kyrenia on the net).