« A Brief Note | Main | Domestic Violence Drops -- But Why? »

December 28, 2006


GWB: Alright, I want more troops.

Anonymous Advisor: Ok Mr. President, how many?

GWB: I don't care, just more.

AA: Ok, what would you have them do?

GWB: Look, there's thousands a people runnin' around sayin' I hafta do sumthin' diffrent, so, here it is: more troops.

AA: Ok, should we put them in Baghdad, elsewhere in the country, should they train Iraqi troops, fight insurgents, figh-

GWB: You're not listening. I want more troops in Iraq, and I want them there now. Don't go askin me a bunch a questions, I told you what to do now do it.

AA: Yes sir.

GWB: Good, now hopefully everyone will shut the f*ck up. I'm goin' ta bed.

From the AP, President Bush worked nearly three hours at his Texas ranch on Thursday to design a new U.S. policy in Iraq, then emerged to say he and his advisers need more time...

Three whole hours! Is this what he means by "hard work"? Five more troops died on Thursday, plus at least 30 Iraqis.

GWB: I'm going into this room for three hours and I don't want any interruptions. I've got to carry out the mandate the merican people gave me in November.

Advisor: Do you need anything, Sir?

GWB: Bring me a protractor, some string, and a dartboard. Hold the darts. My Father already knows where they will land so I don't need to go through the rigamarole of throwing the durn things!

Advisor: Do you require a map of Baghdad?

GWB: (voice rising) No, I don't need a map of Baghdad! If I needed a map of Baghdad, I'd ask for one! I know Baghdad like I know the back of my hand (the Advisor notices a yellow smiley face pasted to the back of the President's hand). (pauses) You can bring me some polar bear jerky in a couple of hours because I can see I'll be feelin a might bit peckish.

Advisor: Are you taking calls?

GWB: Nope! And no emails either. Who cares what they think? You can let Kissinger through but only because I like the idea of receiving counsel from a guy who talks like Jackie Mason. His voice sounds like the one in my head, and I don't mean Metternich or Mellencamp or Ribbentrop or whatever their names were.

The Advisor closes the door behind him and in a few moments hears the unmistakeble sound of a child bouncing a baseball against the wall and catching it on the rebound in a baseball glove. After a while, some diversionary paper shuffling, and silence. Then snoring.

Bush will make mystics of you yet. I would find him more believable if he would hold his breath while speaking.

Love the sardonic humor.

Waiting for Bush's New Direction to be announced definitely has its Waiting for Godot quality.

Estragon: Nothing to be done.

Vladimir: I'm beginning to come round to that opinion.


"It's not that the president has some policy initiative in mind whose operational requirements dictate a surge in force levels."

I hate to break in here with a serious note, but there are some "initiatives" available to the President. As I posted in an earlier thread, many involve a considerable increase in brutality and atrocity. If y'all don't think there are ways, if not to win the war...which may indeed not be possible, always depending on the definition of "win"...then at least to kill a whole bunch more Iraqis on the way out of town you
are wrong.

Like callin the B-52s and JDAMS and flattening everything that doesn't have oil under it. There are precedents for Presidents, in 1968 and 1972. There are steps short of that, still unacceptable, that I guess we would just have to accept. I am still not completely certain the war can't be "won":there are likely only 3 million Sunni Arabs left in Iraq, and Sadr influences 2 million. That's doable. Still leaves like 15-20 million alive, and maybe a little more co-operative. Probably not.

Yeah sorry, I care more about the 100 Iraqi casualties to the one American casualty. It's a flaw.

It could be the Pentagon and soldiers won't help Bush kill Iraq. But the problem with the multiple tous is the combat fatigue andburnout. Now combat fatigue shows up in a lot of forms, but many able to go over for their third tour will have become disillusioned, calloused, exhausted just determine to personally survive at whatever cost. Either a bug in the too small military, or a feature.

Riverbend is back h/t Juan Cole

I cry everytime I read her posts, for a bunch of reasons.

Riverbend is back

bob bob bob, I don't know why you cry, can't you see we've given Riverbend the wonderful gift of Freedom™? How often before the U.S. invasion did headless corpses show up in the streets of Baghdad, hmm? I bet it wasn't everyday, but now, just look at them, sprinkled here and there like daisies.

And certainly Saddam wouldn't have let his people enjoy fun little games like "dodge the car-bomb," or "identify the dead relative" or the ever so entertaining "guess who's been tortured and beheaded." All of which your average Iraqi gets to enjoy, if not daily, at least several times a week.

I know that her post seems dire, but that's just from the fact that she is so overjoyed for her new found Freedom™ that she laughed so much she was driven into despair. I mean, there's so much happiness to go around in Iraq these days that I'm surprised there's not more desparation and depression!

And I would note that the Somalis are the next ones who get to enjoy their Freedom™, so graciously provided to them by the Ethiopians and a helping hand from Uncle Sam.

Plus, take a look at all the Freedom™ in this article.

An excerpt:

Even on the relatively ''safe'' side of the river, a dizzying assortment of armed men roamed freely. In the space of an hour, we encountered the Badr Organization militia, the Mahdi Army militia, the Kurdish peshmerga militia, the Iraqi police, Interior Ministry commandos, the Iraqi military, American troops, the Oil Protection Force, the motorcade of a Communist Party official and Central Bank guards escorting an armored van.

All jolly bunches to be sure. Civic organizations, like the Shriners or your local bowling team.

And even more games, like "assassination roulette":

Even Mr. Milk is dead. The grocer we called by the name of his landmark shop in the upscale Mansour district was kidnapped and killed, along with his son, my colleagues said. The owner of a DVD shop where I once purchased a copy of Napoleon Dynamite also had been executed.

and "bomb the dead":

So many blindfolded, tortured corpses turn up that an Iraqi co-worker recently told me it was "a slow day" when 17 bodies were found. Typically, the figure is 40 or more. When the overflowing morgue at Yarmouk Hospital was bombed last month, one of our drivers wearily muttered, "How many times can they kill us?"

Freedom™: live it!

I urge all Americans who share my grave concerns over this looming decision to call, write or email the President

I like Obama. He's a smart guy, way smarter than myself. But he could have just as well said "I urge all Americans who share my grave concerns over this looming decision to sing 'I'm Henry the VIII I am, I am' over and over again" and it will have the same outcome

The comments to this entry are closed.