What Do Women Want?

by hilzoy

In the case of women who live with men (unlike me, she said, pouting), this:

"A Spanish designer has come up with what could be the perfect solution for the woman who feels frustrated that she has to do all the house chores.

It is a washing machine called "Your Turn", which will not let the same person use it twice in a row.

It uses fingerprint recognition technology to ensure the job of loading is not dumped on just one individual. (...)

"I thought it would be good to finish with macho man from the ice age who doesn't do anything around the house except drink beers," said Torres, from DeBuenaTinta in Barcelona. (...)

So what about the cheats - how can you get round it?

Torres has an unusual solution: "I suggest the man can leave his finger at home... we have 10 fingers, so he won't miss one - well, you don't use the little finger a lot.

"Seriously though, the only way to override the system is to crawl around the back of the machine, unplug the sensor, take it back to the home computer and re-programme it - not that easy.

"We have to make it difficult to change otherwise it defeats the object of the exercise." "

Guys will love it, too. I am sure that all the men who get into arguments with women about who does more housework genuinely believe that they do just as much as their significant others. And yet they must, from time to time, feel a pang of self-doubt: are they absolutely sure that she is the one who is kidding herself? Might they possibly be wrong? As the very thought of dumping all the housework on one's significant other is surely too much for an honorable man to bear, these must be moments of torment, all the more so because the question they raise is so hard to settle conclusively. But with this washing machine, they can finally lay these nagging doubts to rest, at least as regards the laundry.

I'm sure couples everywhere are eagerly awaiting vacuum cleaners that cannot be used by the same person twice, and that will not shut off until until a room has been thoroughly vacuumed; refrigerators that will, once every month or so, refuse to release their contents until someone other than the person who cleaned them last cleans them, and similar appliances. Isn't technology wonderful?

Comments

[John Thullen]

I am proof that laundry can be accomplished while drinking beer. However, guys, don't set your beer down on the washing machine after you've overloaded it and it begins its walk across the basement floor. Wasted beer.

Also, always forget to put those static-prevention little sheety things in the dryer; this will insure that your significant other doubts your competency and will step in on occasion.

Dusting, I hate. Dust should receive the death penalty.

[liberal japonicus]

Now that that one is solved, attention turns to the raised toilet seat problem...

[hilzoy]

JT: I agree completely. I spent quite a while testing the theory that if I just ignored dust long enough, it would get the message and go somewhere where it could feel appreciated. Alas, no.

[Tad Brennan]

Yikes--I find it slightly vertiginous to move from the gravity of the last few points, to the levity of this one. No, not vertigo--I'm suffering from the bends, as a result of decompression.

[bob mcmanus]

"Also, always forget to put those static-prevention little sheety things in the dryer; this will insure that your significant other doubts your competency and will step in on occasion."

Absolutely, she insists towels and sheets have two softener steps. Total of five dial settings from dirt to dry. So she does the laundry.

I do 90% of the other housework, and 100% of the yardwork. Vacuum carpets 2-3 times a week, shampoo once a week. Full house. Etc.

Since we put in the dog flap....you wouldn't believe the dust. We sometimes wipe the piano and watch it film over as we eat dinner. I swear to God, 1 mm/hr accumulation. Every hour. Filthy energetic canines.

[John Thullen]

Tad Brennan: I'm a little dizzy myself. From parody to levity I go; nothing is true, merely revealing of something, maybe me, but hopefully of more than that.

[Happy Jack]

lj- problem solved

[Anarch]

In the case of women who live with men (unlike me, she said, pouting)...

Yeah, like that's not gonna start a brawl in here...

[xanax]

What this little technical marvel fails to explain is how one gets one's wife to help with the laundry. Aha! A date. We stoll hand in hand to the laundry room when it's her turn to push the buttom. Awww. Pure romance.

[xanax]

What this little technical marvel fails to explain is how one gets one's wife to help with the laundry. Aha! A date. We stoll hand in hand to the laundry room when it's her turn to push the buttom. Awww. Pure romance.

[Jackmormon]

Hmmph. I live in NYC and keep my windows open most of the year round. Dust, soot, grime and I are friends. Once a month, maybe, I dust--with bleach.

Hilzoy, are you keeping track of your marriage proposals? I'd propose to you myself, but I think it's illegal most places.

And just for the record, I find it sad and hilarious that advanced laundry-machine technology is marketing itself as a solution to marital strife. Fingerprint identification, indeed.

[Nicholas Weininger]

Also, always forget to put those static-prevention little sheety things in the dryer; this will insure that your significant other doubts your competency and will step in on occasion.

YMMV. I've been doing this for, oh, five years now, and it's gotten me pretty much nowhere.

And a word of caution for those who would take it an extra step: forgetting not to put the daintier "lay flat to dry" items in the dryer is even less effective-- and tends to produce negative side effects that would in any case outweigh all possible benefit. :-)

[John Biles]

Seems to me like as soon as one spouse gets sick or is gone on a business trip, you're screwed, since you can't chose to operate the machine all yourself in a situation where the other person is not available.

[felixrayman]

This won't work. Men will wear dirty clothes. Newt Gingrich got exactly one thing right. The issue is not the willingness of one sex or the other to do more housework, the issue is that one sex sees more housework waiting to be done than the other.

I mean.....dusting? WTF?

[Freder Frederson]

Laundry problem solved--find something of hers that is "dry clean only" and throw it in with a load of jeans. It has worked on two wives so far (was not the cause of the first divorce and I am still with the second one). She'll never ask you to do laundry again ;). Sorry I can't help with the dusting, that is "my job" :(.

[Jesurgislac]

In the case of women who live with men (unlike me, she said, pouting)...

Yeah, like that's not gonna start a brawl in here...

I have a solution for this... ;-)

[Ogosdinos]

I think we're neglecting what's interesting about this product. Most people who have bright ideas for goods are looking to make it faster, easier, cheaper. This washing machine actually makes work *harder*, on the pretext that you're spending money on discipline. I too live alone, and I would pay dear money if someone would stand over my shoulder and punch me in the head before I began procrastinating. (I'm usually five minutes deep into procrastination before I even *realize* I'm procrastinating.) Any suggestions on where to find such a product or what might be a substitute for it?

[Jay C.]

lj & Happy Jack:

Since by universal (and gender-specific) consensus, the problem seems not to be so much that the XY-gendered among us have a apparent ingrained difficulty in raising the seat, but rather in lowering it as a matter of habit: how hard would it be to invent a self-lowering toilet seat? I mean, fancy Japanese electronics aren't required, why not just a simple, mechanical solution; say, a spring-powered arm that would lower a raised seat after a reasonable interval (with a disabling switch in case of a stag beer-bust being held, or whatever).
C'mon, whatever happened to good old Yankee know-how?

PS: If I see somthing like this being offered for sale on cable TV anytime soon, I'm gonna sue! My idea! (I think). And I have the ObsidianWings archives to back me up!

[wilfred]

In the case of women who live with men (unlike me, she said, pouting)

oh hilzoy, you glutton for punishment, be careful what you wish for!

[Dianne]

There's an easy solution to the laundry quandry for people who live in cities: pay someone else to do it. The nearest laundrymat that picks up and delivers is speeddial button #8 on our phone.

[Bernard Yomtov]

JayC,

why not just a simple, mechanical solution; say, a spring-powered arm that would lower a raised seat after a reasonable interval (with a disabling switch in case of a stag beer-bust being held, or whatever).

I think you could get venture capital funding for that. I'd apply for a patent right away.

Just think of the great infomercials.

[freelunch]

Bernard,

I would pay not to see those infomercials.

[chris]

Ah but the real work in doing laundry is folding it. Shoving it into the machine, no worries. Tossing it in the dryer...easy. Standing there and folding all that junk? Bah.

[Happy Jack]

Jay C.- a simple baffle would work for your idea.

Better yet, a concertina. As it slowly unfolds to drop the lid, you could listen to a tune while you wash your hands! :)

[Anarch]

I would pay not to see those infomercials.

See, Bernard? You've already got a guaranteed return on your investment!

[Slartibartfast]

Me: Two kinds of laundry: white, and everything else.

Her: Fifteen kinds of laundry, no manual, no instructions. Which clothing items get which heat/vigorousness/detergent/softner/dryer settings is a matter of memory.

Result: Slam-dunk that I get it wrong. Also slam-dunk that I look bad if I only do MY laundry. Workaround: she does the laundry. I fold sometimes (we have a similar issue with folding, though), she cooks mostly, I clean the kitchen nearly always, I do all the yard work, all the heavy lifting, all the cutting-in when painting, all the pool maintenance, all of the reflooring, repairing, surround-sound wiring, etc. She does all the decluttering, decorating, organizing, and we have a woman come in once a week to do the mopping, vacuuming, dusting, toilet-cleaning, etc. Oh, and we have a kid from down the street cut and edge once a week; I'd do it myself but he only charges me $25 and we have a pretty large corner lot (translation: approximately 3-4 times the edging).

[xanax]

Slart: "all the cutting-in when painting"

Tango?

[xanax]

Slart: "all the cutting-in when painting"

Tango?

[sidereal]

"attention turns to the raised toilet seat problem"

There is no problem. Men are expected to reconfigure the toilet for their use before their use. Women, however, believe it should be reconfigured for their use by someone else. Tyrannical! Of course, I always close the toilet down, including the lid, because otherwise our cats drink out of it. But it's the principle.

On topic,
what women want is a dishwasher that Brad Pitt operates in the nude. Do I get a prize for thread victory?

[Slarti]

Tango? No. We've painted the inside of our house at least two complete coats since we've moved in. Which was four years ago. So, a lot of painting has occurred.

sidereal: Yeah, I always get upset when the wife leaves the seat down.

[xanax]

Sympathies, Slarti. Course that's just because I detest (D-E-T-E-S-T) painting... especially interior. I'll fix, or build or wire or plumb or tile or grout pretty much anything but don't ask me to paint it. As for the toilet seat: It stays down (In the urinal vs. bidet debate, I lost. So now, instead of horsing around with the toilet seat, I either pee in the bidet or outside). Problem solved.

[Jay C]

Happy Jack: 12:24 pm:

Jay C.- a simple baffle would work for your idea.

Got it right in one, Jack: I'm already baffled! Simple.

[Jesurgislac]

what women want is a dishwasher that Brad Pitt operates in the nude. Do I get a prize for thread victory?

Nope. Because while I wouldn't mind having Brad Pitt do the dishes, I'd prefer him to keep his clothes on, thanks. (Sigourney Weaver? But if I had Sigourney Weaver in the house, why would I want her to waste her time doing dishes?)

[bob mcmanus]

"Course that's just because I detest (D-E-T-E-S-T) painting... especially interior."

I love painting, especially since I moved from sloppy uncontrollable

(was always pressing too hard or not hard enough; too much or little paint;splattering...I admit to lack of skill)

rollers to a five or six inch brush. Like a Tom Sawyer thing.

Except for the furniture moving. And the newspaper laying. And the trim. And the stippled textured ceilings.

[sidereal]

I have it on good authority that Juliette Binoche is a recommended substitute for the non-Pitt aligned.

[bob mcmanus]

"because otherwise our cats drink out of it."

This is a problem? Main water source for the canines. Or do you just use those blue thingys to avoid the occasional scrub?

[Phil]

Man, I have never gotten the whole housework dichotomy thing. Maybe because, after my parents divorced, my mother expected my sister and I to help out, and she made sure we know what we were doing: "This is how you vacuum a room properly, this is how you clean a toilet, I will wash your clothes but you have to get them and put them away," and so forth. Around our house, it's 50-50, and we trade off a lot. Coming home from the gym yesterday, it was, "Would you rather empty the catboxes and vacuum, or fold laundry and clean the kitchen?" Stuff like that.

The only thing I absolutely hate and will not do is mopping the floors. Anything else, I'm game.

[hilzoy]

Phil: interesting: my Dad is like that. His parents divorced (unusually for the time), and doing stuff around the house was just a matter of helping out, not a gendered thing. My parents didn't divorce, but my brother (and my sister and I) are the same way, I assume because neither of my parents treated housework as a gendered thing. (When they got married, they knew, between the two of them, one recipe, for something called 'California Pilaf', which I have had on occasion, but would prefer not to inquire into more closely. (It was Dad who knew that one.) Also, my Dad, unlike xanax, does not do home repair -- that baffles both of them -- so no possibility of splitting things up into his doing repairs and her doing the housework. The combination of not knowing that they were supposed to divide things up along gendered lines and being both more or less clueless about it all worked wonders.)

I suspect that over time, as more and more people become like Phil and my Dad, and thus the chain of transmission of these odd ideas is broken, the unequal divisions will fade away. Maybe that's just the optimist in me, though.

[Anarch]

When they got married, they knew, between the two of them, one recipe, for something called 'California Pilaf', which I have had on occasion, but would prefer not to inquire into more closely.

Ahhhhh... academics in love.

[John Thullen]

So, someone dear to me is in the midst of a dreadfully horrific divorce; it's got everything you might want in a divorce on a reality show about divorce. Utter, bitter misery.

But the marriage counselor asked the wife: "So, what exactly, is the problem with this guy in your eyes?"

Answer: "He has never done the laundry the way I want"

Now, if you knew the details about EVERYTHING else, you will understand why the counselor was, with jaw on floor, dumbfounded.

But, there you go.

[Brad Maxcy]

About the aforementioned self-lowering toilet seat. It's already been invented. Some even have remote controls, heating, and self cleaning timers. Check out http://www.hygieneforhealth.com/takagi.htm