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January 23, 2005

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This news is so bad.

I have arrived at the Slawson (sp?) cutoff and now I'm really going to cut off my slawson.

May his camel be forever humped at the eternal oasis.

Or something. This just about totals the week.

Feeling kinda young right now.

I'm feeling kind of culturally alienated. I have never seen the Johnny Carson Show. But Edward's memorial is very sweet.
Nixon's secretary just died. I remember her.

Johnny had a classy show (you really understand this once you subject yourself to Leno), and I really appreciated the fact that once he was done, he went private. It seemed to me that it meant that he was comfortable with himself, with what he'd accomplished, and he could just spend time with family and friends without the need for further adulation. I wish so many others would have followed that dignified example.

Edward remembers the meat loaf crumbs. I remember the Karnak joke. Holding up the sealed envelope to his forehead, Johnny/Karnak intoned, "Philip the III." Then he ripped the short side of the envelope off, blew it open, pulled out the card (this routine was sacred, and said, "What do you tell the bartender who gives you three shot glasses but only pours into two?"

My favourite Carnak bit (stripped of the sacred routine):

"Sis Boom Bah"

"What do you call an exploding sheep?"

Yes, a class act in that he was never mean-spirited.

But he did do off-color bits. There's the time one of the Gabor sisters was on his show, and had a cat in her lap, and asked him "Vould joo like to pet my poosy?" And Johnny said, "Sure, just get rid of that damned cat."

I watched Leno a couple of times: once out of curiosity, the second time to confirm the negative first impression. Feh. Oily and smug.

I am so old I remember the game show. (But, barely).

Ya know, the guy defined or illustrated the perfect television personality. From the midwest (non)-accent to the self-deprecating humour to the pleasant looking non-sexual not-quite handsomeness. Being ordinary can make you rich and famous if you can project it extraordinarily well.

Never was a fan, still don't watch such stuff, but the man was umm, just fine folks. An ok guy. A good dude. And I am sincere, not sarcastic.

Karnak to Ed: May the fleas from a thousand camels infest your armpits.

Karnak answer: Peter Pan
Envelope Question: What do you use to fry Peter?

My absolute favorite, though, was when he'd use pictures of people in the audience as characters in some fictitious soap opera introduction. I just have an image of some middle-aged woman in the audience who, among other things "...would like to hose down the toolbox of..." the next guy in the lineup. Those always had me in stitches.

Karnak to Ed: May the fleas from a thousand camels infest your armpits.

That seems much more vivid to me now than the first time I heard it...having seen a camel up close. Blech!

Carson was only borderline harmless...CaseyL's anecdote explaining why not totally. Still he wasn't as overtly threatening as Letterman or as (to borrow the perfect description from CaseyL) oily as Leno.

The magic of his show was the classy intimacy he developed with the viewers at bed time. There was something ever so slightly sexual (in a middle class pajamas and nightcap foreplay between definitely married couples sort of way) about the show's format (and the off-color jokes were a part of that). Safe, accessible, good-natured...again, a real prince.

May the sewers of Rangoon back up into your breakfast.

Karnak answer: Peter Pan
Envelope Question: What do you use to fry Peter?

OK everyone, Carnac starts and ends with a c. Your attention to this is greatly appreciated.

Carson was only borderline harmless...CaseyL's anecdote explaining why not totally.

Which is why it's such a shame that it's not true.

you left out what a wonderful father and husband he was. you are wrong divorce-breath.

Which is why it's such a shame that it's not true.

that is a shame...funny how if you hear a story enough times you will swear you saw it happen...

you left out what a wonderful father and husband he was

never having been part of his private life, I wouldn't pass judgment on this.

One would have to wonder then if also apocryphal is the following (and oft repeated) Johnny Carson / Arnold Palmer anecdote:

Carson: Does your wife do anything special for you the night before tournaments?

Palmer: Well, yes she does. She kisses each of my balls.

Carson: I bet that makes your putter stand on end!

If it's not true... it should be. Bye, Johnny.

You were SO cool.

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